I found an old journal the other day. As far as old goes, it’s not that old, a little less than two years. But as far as life goes, it could have been written a millennia ago.
A mentor gave me a stack of stripes of paper, each one having a name or attribute of Jesus written on it. She instructed me to pick 7 and focus on one each day of the week.
The strips were all laid out and slowly seven were chosen. The ones that jumped out at me, the ones I heard Jesus whisper, “Pick that one!”, the ones that seemed significant.
And really which ones don’t?
It’s an act of Jesus grace that He slowly unfolds and unfurls Himself for us and to us. He doesn’t expect us to fully grasp Him all at once. He knows Himself and our heart so intimately He knows just which facet of His character, His life we need in that exact moment.
And He meets us there with Himself. He always meets us. Always meets us where are, with what we need. And what we always need is Him. More of Him.
We need our understanding broadened. Our scope widened. We don’t love and serve a one-dimensional God, just as we are not one-dimensional people.
Seven little strips of paper. One steno pad full of 100 blank pages. One small, hopeful woman and one Mighty God.
Oh Lord, help me choose. Which parts of You do I need to know more right here, right now? Which one is first, Jesus? Then second?
Then on down the line, I asked with each one. Until my first month was complete. The steno pad was opened and on the first page, blank, but full of hope and promise, I wrote the week and the day. I recorded there in ink Who my Jesus was and what that meant I am. The verse He put in my mind was penned there too.
And then on each page my heart soared as my hand scribbled His truth whispered on my heart, shouted in my mind.
It’s been two years almost since I started that journal. I have nearly filled those 100 pages with His Life, His Truth.
They’ve been filled with Him. His presence. His grace.
Here’s the funny thing. He is still speaking the same things to my heart today. Two years and He’s saying the same things. Is it because I’ve failed a test? I’ve failed to grasp the truth of Him?
No. His repeated teaching does not mean we are stupid. It shows His faithfulness. His repeated teaching does not mean we’re being punished because we screwed it all up again and failed Him again. It shows His great patience and love. It shouts of His knowing how we are made and the very realness of our enemy.
His repeated teaching is an act of His grace. It shines like a beacon of the Light of His Life.
Dear soul, please take these words with you into your new year. His repeated teaching is not a punishment, it’s grace. It’s His gift.